Michelle Renee Speaks

Control. We all want it. We don't always get it. Sometimes we get it, then decide we don't want it. Sigh. In my life I've come to recognize control as an old familiar acquaintance, continually proving that my sense of having it is simply an illusion. Just when I think I have it, it's often yanked from my groping hands and there's not much I can do about it.  When we feel like we are in control, we often feel pretty comfortable with it. You may tell yourself you've earned it. You may snatch it away from someone else and justify it. You may hoard it, thinking no one can hurt you. You may sacrifice pieces of your character to have it. You may hide behind it. When we feel out of control, we often feel frantic. Why are we afraid to let go of it? we feel weak we feel uncomfortable we feel ineffective we feel frustrated we feel exposed we feel like we are floundering, grasping we wonder what will happen and how we...

Perhaps you've heard this famous verse from the Bible a 1000 times like I have: Be still and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10) I even have it on a beautiful piece of art hanging in my kitchen. This framed photo captures a bare tree in the winter surrounded by snow, cold and complete stillness. In the past year especially, this verse has taken on new meaning for me as our family has been through the ringer. We have endured trials of many kinds; including personal betrayal, slander, rejection, moving to several different states in one year, job losses, death of a close family member and more. All of this, on top of a previous year of burnout and major medical issues.  Not whining, just being real with you. Honestly, it's been hard to be still through all of this turmoil. How does God expect me to do this? There are problems to be solved here! There is justice to be had here! God, where are you? It was one of those moments I was asking Him thi...

What's the first thing you do when you get up?   Me? I'm not a morning person by any stretch of the imagination. Those of you who know me are probably laughing right now!   I've tried to convert, I really have! Alas, it just doesn't work for me. And to be honest with you, overly joyful morning people are annoying...well, to those of us who- let's say- are not. I've had other "non-morning" people tell me that it's fingernails-scratching-a-chalkboard annoying.   I can relate. (dear morning friends and family, I love you)   There is a beauty in that though. We all do our best work at varying times of day and we are simply built differently. Some work their genius in the morning, while others deliver genius at night. I appreciate the variety, because if everyone was built like me, nothing would ever open before noon!   I read an article recently that proposed this thought: t he most defining moment of...

Yes...you read that title correctly. I'm (still) proud to be an American. The world is not my "home"...but right now I live here. And I care deeply about where our country is going. Do I believe that we have major problems?  Yes. But despite all the crazy stuff going on, I'm (still) proud to be an American. For some reason, a person gets persecuted these days for saying that. As a person of faith, I know that all the people of the world are on the same level at the foot of the cross. We are all deeply loved by our Creator- no matter where we live. Still, I love my country. I still get tears in my eyes when the National Anthem is played or sung. I can't help it. I'm moved by the countless people who have given their lives to protect my freedom. I still put my hand on my heart when reciting the pledge of allegiance. I must. Fighting for what we feel is right- is right-  especially when it concerns things we hold s...

A simple moment.  The name stuck. I was in college.  Sitting in the living room adorned with lace doilies and floral upholstery, tea and cookies were enjoyed by all.  Casual conversation felt comfortable, like the hand crafted quilt spread across the overstuffed chair I was sitting in. Our elderly friends were full of interesting stories and lots of laughter.   Suddenly a male voice pipes up above the others and declares rather loudly, "when is that piano girl going to play us that there piano?"  His wife looked at him and said, "She has a name ya know!"...to which he responded "Well, she IS the girl that plays piano ain't she?" I smiled.  I played.  And the name was born.